Biting Off More Than I Can Chew

Like sand through the hourglass, these are the days of my life. I feel it deep in my soul that I am doing the right thing with my life by being out here and traveling Asia. I’ve felt it for awhile, but Da Nang has amplified my receptors to the reality that we only live once.

Today I went to the beach, and that was fun. I have been chilling with this guy Sinan, and it turns out he’s a pretty cool dude. At first I was unsure, as I am usually unlikely to team up with an outgoing person such as Sinan, but in the end it turns out I am very happy to have met him. Many of my interactions begin as an exchanging of numbers, but not very often do people actually convince me to leave my shell. Ha! It was a good time chilling with Sinan. He went to Hoi An today, as well as Gretta, Nora, and Karine. I was supposed to go with them and then come back with Karein later, so she could catch her flight at 21:00 and I could catch a hip-hop show around that same time, but I canceled at the last minute. I bet they think lame of me for that, but I had to get thinking about that ‘only live once’ thing and jump ship in favor of better prospects.

I met these two nice ladies on the beach, Anya and Sylvia, and I ended up having a pretty lengthy conversation with them about a great many things. There are certainly a lot of interesting people passing through this city, and I am really grateful for my past-self in taking a leap of life and coming out here. I invited the two ladies to the hip-hop show later, and that would be cool if they attended. Honestly I am a bit anxious about going out tonight, but that is pretty much normal in my life and I deal with it pretty well I think.

The future holds many cards for me, I feel it. Tuesday I have that demo…and then I have some serious decisions to make. You know what? It feels like I should absolutely accept the English teaching position if it is offered to me. Wouldn’t anyone say it is a foolish thing to pass up an opportunity to teach in Vietnam for 6 months; say that such an event is a ripple in the normality of the human condition, and to not grasp that sentiment fully would be just adding another brick to the wall that is my monotonous  and inert folly? Yet…I feel so drawn in going back to San Francisco. I love that place. I mean it really feels like home in a way no other place has felt like home, but that’s not even why I wish to return! If I arrive back there after being out of the city only 4 or 5 months, I might have a real chance at free City College. I can live in SF, go to school there for free (if I play my cards right), and eventually hold a degree from a UC school. That sounds like the path that would enhance my life greater than if I stayed in Vietnam and taught English. Or maybe…maybe I am just frightened of doing a job I am unfamiliar with, in a field of study I never dreamed of entering: teaching kids. I suppose I could try and do both (the teaching position would end about the same time the school year starts), but I don’t know if I can bring myself to harness that level of exceptionalism quite so rapidly. We shall see. Hmm. The time is 18:04 in Da Nang, and that’s all I got for you right now. Peace!


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