A Clean Slate

I am melting. Like a fire hydrant on acid, in a rainstorm, with no coat. God damn bucking horse underneath it’s ass! Racing! We both racing! And it’s not to a finish line. The loser of this match…well they’re going to die. What do you know about loss? Ever lost your mind before?

I am writing to you from Happy Donuts in North Beach. I haven’t ordered anything yet, but here I sit. I bought an all day bus pass again today, and again I didn’t see a muni cop. That’s everyday. I have not had but one interaction with a muni cop since I got back, if I recall correct.

You know, I am supposed to be writing a post for one of my other blogs right now. I should probably get around to doing that.

I am going to open up a new document, get a coffee, probably a donut, and I am going to write an article about ASMR. The time is 19:04.

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The time is now 22:14, and I actually got quite a bit done tonight. Published my second asmr.community article, and I feel great about it! So check it out, and I’ll probably write some more in the morning. Peace from Happy Donuts in North Beach.

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This morning I got an advertisement for a service called Matcha, and what they do is help the internet become standardized. haahaha I’m kidding af. They are a new kind of content mill [is that insulting?], where you can, presumably, purchase content for your blog, social media, or email. This will, of course, save you time and money on all sorts of valuable assets, and in exchange you will only lose your originality. Granted…the idea has merit. If one used Matcha to fill in the gaps of their online presence, they might get away with it. In fact, I am thinking that might be the move for me. Write 60% of my own material, hire other content creators for 15%, and grab some material from Matcha for the last 15%. Wow. I think I might really be on to something here.

I suppose this is a hot topic of conversation for me because I officially have two blogs. Make sure to check out asmr.community and thestonedheretic.com when you have some free time. Both are extremely bare-bones right now, but there is content. I plan to publish another piece of content today, but what it will be I am unsure of yet. Perhaps I will only work on the back end of things. I have a longg way to go with that thing, and honestly, I feel like less is more at this stage in the game. That means I need to resist the urge to fuck around with the website, and I instead I need to just publish some more content.

Right now I am eating a bomb-ass breakfast sandwich from Happy Donuts. Who woulda thunk it! When I first came in I asked the lady, whom I didn’t know, if I could just “hang out” for 30 minutes without purchasing anything [I didn’t want to start my day with Happy Donuts], and I tried to tell her I was a regular here, but it took a while to convey that. In the end she let me stay, but it was a lot of yelling back and forth between me and the manager, because he can’t hear. Kind of a crazy way to start the day. So anyway, I eventually went on to order something because I was hungry.

When I stop working, even to take a bite of my food, I find myself thinking about that girl. It kind of sucks, actually. I want to focus on business and it’s very difficult. Anxiety has me worried, but my maturity has me relaxed. It might be, even, that I am turning my anxiety into forward motion. That’s kind of what it feels like. You know, we often talk about how love and passion come from within our heart…but it might be advisable in the age of science to ditch that in favor of a philosophy that instills knowledge about the brain.

The time is 06:20. Starbucks is definitely open. But soon, Trieste, also. I am not sure where to go. My spot in the Marina doesn’t pop the doors until 07:00. The sun is up, and the sky is a light shade of blueish gray. The city is getting colder, although yesterday was a warm day, and I suspect today will be the same. The time is 06:30. I am going to walk to Trieste and smoke a bowl on the way. Peace for now.

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The time is 09:07, only three-ish hours later, and I am writing to you from the Starbucks on Hyde and Beach. I really like how I inserted the break on this post. I will continue to do that. Three stars *** represents a long break between the combined writings, and two vertical bars | | represents a relatively small break, usually only a couple of hours or less. I have certainly not stuck to this format through my entire time writing, and thus the explanation I have provided is, by default, a bad one. Bare with me though, because things are really starting to grow. Starbucks is hella busy right now, and if I leave I will certainly lose my spot. Hmm. I don’t think that is going to stop me from going outside and smoking a bowl. I might not come back if I do that. Where would I go? I have my computer and I am trying really hard not to carry this thing all over creation because it is so heavy, and my back is in bad shape. Seriously lol.

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The time is 12:10 now, and I am at Caffe Trieste, sitting right behind the band, which means I am writing this to you from the back of the coffee house. I just took a photograph, which will be the header image for this article. It’s a pretty good photograph if I don’t say so myself. Hmm. I think I am throwing the vibes off typing…I will be back.

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Now the time is 13:59, and I am still at Trieste. I am however thinking about leaving. I put the computer away, an then I pulled it out again for a little bit while I surfed around the internet looking at stickers, but I have decided not to buy any stickers. Instead, I am thinking I will head back to the crib. But to what avail? When I am at my house I have little choice but to sit in my bed, and it is quite lame. Alas, that will still be my move. Perhaps I will edit this from there…or perhaps I will come back.

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Do you think I wrote about the girl with the green eyes the first first time I met her? I would really like to think I did. I’m telling you guys she walked right up and said she hadn’t seen me in a while, and that is because she fucking remembers me from Mac’d. It is so embarrassing that I forgot her. My memory is truly shot. How can I not remember this most beautiful girl? But I am sure it is her.

She’s in my memory somewhere. Lotssss of smoking weed when I worked at mac’d. That was last year shit. I have no idea what I told her last year, but I am confident it is the same person. And that’s actually not the thickest part of the plot…idk if I am ready to talk about the rest yet; might just leave that to the way-side for now. The time is 17:40 and I am writing to you from Caffe Trieste.

Okay, let’s talk about funding for a second.

Have you ever received a loan for anything? I have never received a loan for diddly-fucking-squat. Actually let me rephrase that. I have received a lot of small loans from my family, and I have pretty much, universally, never paid any of them back. Now I live in San Francisco, the tech capital of the world, and I am going to try and get a loan. I have been dipping my feet in the water for far too long, BUT! my “secret weapon” in the field is my use of asmr as a recovery tool, my patience will prove to be a wise investment, I believe. Credibility is everything, and I definitely don’t want to misguide people. I am not perfect, but I don’t drink alcohol, and with a little vigilance I think I can retire early. Do you want the same? Definitely take seriously the phrase “rapid experimentation.” I didn’t start with asmr, I ended with it.

Mark just left the building. He is a helluva writer, I just know it. Even though I haven’t read any of his scribes. I should know that man better. You know, I actually don’t call him Mark to his face because I haven’t double checked that I am correct about his name, but obviously I am semi-confident in calling him Mark since I intend to publish this on my blog. He won’t read this. I am sure-sure he doesn’t read my blog. The girl with the dragon eyes won’t read it. Awh, there is a couple next to meet holding hands as they drink their coffee, and the impression is that they are in love. They aren’t going to read this. Still however, I write. @practicalpaige just messaged me. Remember when this blog used to really be a ramble? Holy shit. That’s what I should do. I should edit and post the lost articles of Bob’s Donuts. I bet Dragon Eyes is in there. Ugh. So much to do, so little time. Right now, I need to write an article for one of my other blogs. Stoned Heretic it will be, for tonight. I used to call it The Stoned Heretic, but my guy Ant from work thinks I should drop the “The,” and I was already dabbling with that idea, so I am going to drop the “the” on the website, but on ig…should it be stonedhereticglass? Is that better. What about stonedhereticgallery? Right now it’s thestonedheretic, and I could drop it to just stonedheretic. So many choices. What I do know is that I need to change my picture for the product I am selling, and I…holy shit, I could actually be receiving orders and not even know it. I am boned. Peace from Trieste! The time is currently 18:10.

Now the time is 19:27 and I am leaving to go get some food, and then meet Casey. Probably gonna be up hella late again. Eh. Oh well. I DO need to edit this writing before it runs away on me though! Hopefully tomorrow! See you then! Today was for thestonedheretic.com, and I got a little article published; mostly pictures.

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The time is 03:50 in the morning on November 6th, 2019, and I am writing to you from the Montgomery Block Starbucks, or MBS. Hmm SAFTAP was a nice phrase as well, but ever since I found out that the Transamerica Pyramid stands where a famous building called the Montgomery Block once stood, I have thought of this Starbucks differently. When I was young and I dabbled in writing, I didn’t actually know I would become this dedicated.

In the 1930’s there was seventy-five artists renting studio apartments in The Montgomery Block all at the same time. Robert Louis Stevenson, Emma Goldman, Jack London, George Sterling, Lola Montez. Lotta Crabtree, Gelett Burgess, Maynard Dixon, Frank Norris, Ambrose Bierce, Bret Harte, The guy who shot Lincoln, Frida Kahlo, and Mark Twain. Some of those people lived in the building, but they all hung out here.

I have more access to information then all of the people listed, and none of them will ever be able to learn from me, only I from them. Have you ever seen a broken cup reassemble itself and travel from the floor, back up to the table? Me either. Okay, but have you ever cut your foot on a cup that wasn’t broken, it just happened to be lying on the floor?

Spark Twain

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