My paranoia is getting the best of me. Or it isn’t. That’s the thing about having the knowledge that you’re a paranoid person…it is only sometimes true by nature.
That is of no matter. What matters is this:
I am writing to you from Ravii, and I am having a bad day. It feels like every Sunday has been bad. Maybe it’s cuz I spend all Saturday carrying my backpack around? usually? and my shoulder is all fucked up so obviously that is not the move.
Recently I have added so much to my schedule, it is undoubtable that I will fail. I have come to this realization today. Today I was so fucking beat I just couldn’t bring myself to do anything productive. I called my father, and my grandfather. I do enjoy talking to them, but it was played out today. I need new friends.
I killed the vibe at one of my favorite Starbucks, and so I am going to minimize my time there. Maybe stop going all together. My blog has been getting a little crazY recently. I gotta get my mind right, and my head straight.
This Dal Makhani smells like tomatoes, is that normal? I’ve had it here before and thought it was good, but I also read a review on the Google Maps page of someone who ordered tikka, or something, and claims they brought out tomato sauce. Is that what I have here? Lets dig in. 18:40 on January 5th, 2020. From Ravii. [5/10 I’d say, as I edit this]
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The time is 04:01 and I’m at MBSB. It is easier to move mountains and rivers than change the ways of a human. Just your reminder on a Monday. In a world where everybody is focused on being overly positive, I’m bringing you that slice of reality on this Monday morning.
Acai pudding and espresso. Breakfast of champion bloggers! Is there a blogging championship? 2020 is my year to get more involved in the blogging/writing community. I still haven’t even fucking read On The Road. I am behind as behind can be. I wonder how much time Kerouac spent at Montgomery Block?
When I first arrived in The City I lived on Bartol street, and when I first heard about Kerouac [and all them. Ginsberg was the only one of the Beats I had heard of before my arrival to North Beach], I pictured him hanging out in Bartol alley. Now that I am sitting here writing about it, I still think that lol. Idk if he ever hungout in the alley by City Lights Books; City Lights used to be up the street at Grant and Filbert. I do laundry up that way, and I was outside the laundromat, up the road a little, smoking a bowl, when I discovered a plaque on the ground dedicating that spot as a landmark because it was the original spot of City Lights. Most of the time when I do laundry now, I go smoke a bowl standing on that plaque. If not there, then I go north on Grant a little more until I get to this short alley with steps. The position of the steps creates two crevasses, much large enough for a person, with walls on three sides, great for sleeping [Presidio. Don’t even come at me like that]. The first time I found it, I was like “Oh, so Ferlenghetti set up his book shop down the road from the place his friends were sleeping outside lol.” I have no idea if that is true. I bet Mark knows. I should ask him.
Where was I going? Oh yeah! So, I still think The Beats probably hung out in Bartol, because! Allen Ginsberg lived there. After living at that location for more than six months, I learned that Allen used to live in the large blue building across the alley, which is actually 1010 Montgomery [just up the street, this is all very close to both MBSB, and my house], but still the building has an entrance on my side [I had to go to the library to find this information out, although I bet if I went to the Beat Museum a second time I would find it in there]. Casey got to know the guy who lives in the green building, two north, and in fact, that man gave Casey an opportunity to rent his flat, but Casey fucked it up. Damn. Too bad I couldn’t intercept that. That blue building at 1010 Mongomery is where Allen wrote Howl. I haven’t read Howl either! I need to get on my shit! The rickiety building across the alley and behind the playground is where I wrote The Manifestation of Dreams. Not a comparable piece of literature, I am sure, but it’s still a true statement.
I need to step my poetry game UP!
You know what I’ve been thinking about a lot? Doing some poetry reading on YouTube. I got the idea from this girl Savannah Brown. I am to think she got popular doing poetry reading on YouTube? Hmm. Being that I have no friends, and no business partners, and my life is a clean slate with which I can do what I wish, I might left turn onto some crazy path and slam poetry into a tree, over and over again until it doesn’t look the same as when I started slammin’. Even if I take that left turn: What I am going to do is build a stream of income I can maintain from a computer and go back to Asia. I’ve been known that. Im sure I’ll put in all in the monthly email, but not this next one. I need to make a way for yall to sign up from here. Okay…I think I’mma step outside quick. Come back in…edit. Post…word word.
…and that’s exactly how it went down. January 6th, 04:56 in the morning, Montgomery Block Starbucks. Twenty-Twenty vision ts.
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