Once I get where I’m going, it’s going to be a wonder how I took so long to get there. Today could be a significant day! Is that up to me? I’m writing about it because writing is what I do, but also because I’m looking for a raindrop.
I’m listening to the Spotify Billions Playlist. The playlist with all the songs having over a billion plays. Mostly new artists, along with Toto and Queen. Right now it’s Calvin Harris feat Dua Lipa. Something tells me I will never have a song on this list, but never say never, you know? Sometimes I wonder what it feels like to want. You know? People be talking about the hunger. I must not feel it like some people. Perhaps that’s a good thing. I mean, we all want something right? And on the immediate, I want moolah! Haha. That’s my current quest, but it’s part of my overarching story plot. By the time I lay upon my death bed, I will be more well known then Mark Twain himself. Forreal. This is quite conceivable when you realize that nobody in India has ever heard of Mark Twain. And then within 100 years after my death, Mark and I will be about the same level of well known-ness.
In 1000 years, people will think we knew each other. They will forget, even with the knowledge being at their fingertips, that human lifespans used to be so short; fragile. I heard Mark and Spark Twain used to hangout here with Bob Dylan and Frida Kahlo.
Don’t be too hard on them! Remember when you thought Cleopatra knew King Tut? Or when you found out that Socrates tutored Alexander The Great?
Holy shit ~ I just caught up for like a fuckin’ hour reading about ancient Egypt online. No good. I’ve got stuff to do. I’m going to win 0.1 ETH in a rap competition today! And if I do? I’m going to come back next week, duh. I’m hoping to work with these guys in the long term. Maybe I should get on YouTube and rap. I just don’t know haha. I spend a lot of time thinking about how to proceed, instead of proceeding, and that really can be the downfall of any person.
The time is 06:55. Should I go to the coffee shop? Of course! I’ve gone literally every day since I’ve arrived in the city. It’s not good; I can’t afford it. But I’m addicted to socializing. Which isn’t an excuse, but it’s also not an ultimatum.
I should be sitting…but I’m standing instead. Eventually I will sit down. Currently I am listening to myself talk. I’m listening to my latest YT video, and by the time you read this the video will forsure be live [I decided not to post it]. I’m going to use the MTCR internet to get it up there. Mine is so slow! It’s wild. After living at my dad’s in Florida for a year, with his fiber internet connection…wtf was I thinking? I kind of forget until recently that slow internet used to be a main issue for me. Yo. I try not to live with regrets. However, I have been thinking a lot about how I got to be in the fastest growing city in the United States for all of last year, and I had all the tools! All I had to do was go downtown and review a couple of the restaurants haha and I think I would have found a lot of traction on YT. Anyway. I’m still going to keep making YouTube videos. But now…I mean, I’m going to review Albuquerque! But like yo I could have been reviewing Florida. I still can, because I have a shitton of videos that I shot while I was living there but it will take a lifetime to download them with my internet. Even if I use the internet at one of these cafes it will take me a lifetime.
The time is 09:49. I haven’t taken a sip of my coffee yet, but I’m about to.
For a minute I considered seeing if they would let me do a show here on Sunday mornings, and I might still do that, especially if I win 0.1 eth today rappin! Yo ~ I’m so hyped for that shit. Hmm….and I almost wrote that I’ve been working to find a career that comes naturally to me, but then I realized that I really don’t know if I’ve been working towards it or not. I’ve been thought about a lot of stuff haha, and I have created a plethora of content! But…
Yeah, and you know, I’m pretty sure when people used to tell me to record videos and put them on YouTube, I would tell them that I wasn’t down because I didn’t like to edit video. And I guess idk if that is true anymore! When I think about the prospects of another video getting 23k+ views…it feels well worth the effort to put in some time editing. And I just won’t try and do anything too fancy, least I get frustrated. I’d love to hire someone to edit my videos, but first I’ve got to prove the possibilities.
The coffee is not on point today. I could be trippin…but I don’t think I am. Hmm, well, I did only take a dab this morning and I haven’t smoked a bowl yet. Maybe that’s affecting my tastebuds. I’m broke asf ~ that’s why I haven’t smoked haha. Yo, I applied to work at a restaurant, and I got hired. Ugh. Haha. I’ve got to tell you, there is a constant cacophony of emotions and violations running though my head. I could have been worked at a restaurant last year while living with my dad. Idk what I was thinking. I really don’t. I’m brilliant at telling people how to generate wealth, but I have not demonstrated any sort of discipline myself. I legit thought that putting effort into working for myself would pay off. Everytime I have a job, it seems so logical to leave and generate money on my own. I know I am going to be feeling that at this new job at well. I guess…I guess I am hoping to make this the last job I ever have. The pay is not very good, but it will be enough for me to pay the rent. Well, maybe… Actually, I don’t think it will be enough for me to pay the rent, but I’m not that worried about it. I can continue to borrow a couple hundred dollars per month if I have to, and it won’t be breaking anyone’s bank. My intention is to achieve something the likes of which will afford several of my family members to retire. I’m not sure any of them are on that trajectory, currently. Somehow, I know that I am close to achieve a sustainable career. That’s what I want. What I need is a plan. I’m obviously thinking a lot about the prospect of opening a kava bar. And now I’m back to thinking about the prospects of rap music. I think it’s going to be a kava bar for me. I really do. It feels very overwhelming to plan the plan from nothing, and then hope to proceed in getting funded, but now that I have a job, I think that’s the path I am going to take. I am going to keep writing my blog ~ hopefully publish more, actually. I’m going to keep publishing YouTube videos, and I’m going to squeeze everything out of this city that I can while I’m here. Restaurant reviews. Neighborhood reviews. Oh! And you know what I should do? I should put a fundraiser in the description of the videos so that I can get my license back ~ forreal. Right now I have a virtual tip jar setup. I need a better name for that though. Currently it’s sparktwain.com/tipjar, but I’m thinking to change it to something supremely memorable. I’ve thought about using /supremetipjar or /tippergore or /justthetip, but I think all of those are too long. I could use /tips or /tj but just before I accidently used the acronym vtr instead of vtj, and then I backronymed it to mean Virtual Tip Receiver, and I think that that is what I am going to do. I’m about to send a message to my father asking him how her believes I could incorporate an Arduino into my tipjar experience [I thought myself out of this one haha]. Does an Arduino have to be physical? If it’s just virtual…then it’s just code, right? I’m confusing myself. You see, I flipflop a lot. I used to be disappointed in myself for not buckling down and learning computer programming. Back when I was in Asia I started practicing code for like 15-30 minutes per day, and I did that for like a month, but eventually it started to get more difficult, and then I gave up. I suppose that’s the short summary of what happened. If I had kept up with it, would I have become good enough to get a job? Good enough to not confuse myself when I talk about Arduinos? Hmm, we will never know. Fate, or freedom? Sometimes I feel like I cling uncomfortably close to the idea of fate, but at 28, I’m too young to pull away from the hands of freedom.
Have you ever taken the bus to Jerry Church? Every Sunday morning on the OkieDeadhead YT channel, you can ride the bus. I rode last Sunday. I didn’t ride today. I’m writin’ instead! And oh Lorde how I need to make sure I post! Can you imagine if I started posting more often, and then all the sudden I have more readers? That’s how logic dictates it would go though! Despite all of posts upon posts, people always want the newest shiz. I got that. I got the news.
I’m so gonzo, that I was doing it before I knew what it was. Except, well, now that I do know what it is, I think myself to need more practice.
Gonzo Journalism would be like if you went to the Running of the Bulls in Spain in order to write about and report upon it. Gonzo Journalism is becoming one with what you are writing about. Like becoming a member of the Mafia for 2 years in order to write your book about them.
Me? I live amongst the cadets, and my reports will help the next round prior to their report for duty.
That was confusing. I think I really only wrote it because I had to go pee and I wanted to finish the thought up haha. But…I’m not going to delete it. I’m going to dive back into it another day! Peace! Until soon! Come thru discord and see my rap today https://discord.gg/SD3nwZFUfb
x. Spark Twain